Ally Brooke says she was 'emotional' on DWTS after she was saved but James Van Der Beek was NOT

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Ally Brooke from the band Fifth Harmony has recounted an ’emotional’ experience from her days on Dancing With The Stars.

While on her YouTube series The Ally Brooke Show, the crooner, 27, said she felt terrible when she was saved and her competitor James Van Der Beek was not when they appeared on the dance competition show in 2019.

The Dawson Creek’s star’s wife had just experienced a miscarriage and it was a difficult time for the family but Van Der Beek still danced which made Brooke feel like he deserved to not be eliminated.

A hard experience: Ally Brooke from the band Fifth Harmony has recounted an 'emotional' experience from her days on Dancing With The Stars. While on her YouTube series The Ally Brooke Show, the crooner, 27, said she felt terrible when she was saved and her competitor James Van Der Beek was not when they appeared on the dance competition show in 2019

A hard experience: Ally Brooke from the band Fifth Harmony has recounted an ’emotional’ experience from her days on Dancing With The Stars. While on her YouTube series The Ally Brooke Show, the crooner, 27, said she felt terrible when she was saved and her competitor James Van Der Beek was not when they appeared on the dance competition show in 2019 

Ally told her former partner Sasha Farber during her show that James was the better dancer.  ‘He was the one to watch during the season because he always performed beautifully,’ she maintained.

And he was so professional he even danced after his family experienced a loss. ‘That week he had the devastation of losing a baby,’ said Ally. ‘Him having the strength to still go on the show and perform and dance… It was just a bunch of mixed emotions.’

Van Der Beek’s wife Kimberly suffered a miscarriage in November 2019 as she was expecting their sixth child. ‘My wife Kimberly went through every expectant parent’s worst nightmare – we lost the baby,’ the actor, 43, said on Dancing with the Stars. Van Der Beek was partnered with Emma Slater. 

She was saved, not him: The Dawson Creek's star's wife had just experienced a miscarriage and it was a difficult time for the family but Van Der Beek still danced which made Brooke feel like he deserved to not be eliminated; from left, Sasha, Ally, Tom, Erin, Emma and James

She was saved, not him: The Dawson Creek’s star’s wife had just experienced a miscarriage and it was a difficult time for the family but Van Der Beek still danced which made Brooke feel like he deserved to not be eliminated; from left, Sasha, Ally, Tom, Erin, Emma and James

‘The little soul that we had expected to welcome in our family took a shortcut to whatever lies beyond,’ he said. ‘You never know why these things happen. That’s what I’ve been telling my kids. All you know is that it brings you closer together.’ 

Van Der Beek, who shares five children with Kimberly – Olivia, Joshua, Annabel, Emilia and Gwendolyn – went into detail about the heartache he was experiencing in the wake of the family tragedy. She went on to have another miscarriage in June 2020. 

Ally said that being saved while James was dropped made people hurl abuse at her online. ‘I got a lot of hate,’ she shared on her show. ‘It was horrible.’ She added the move made her an ’emotional punching bag.’

Lose me, not him: Brooke asked host Tom Bergeron if she could leave the show so Van Der Beek could go to the final round. Farber shared: 'I remember at one point you were like "No, no, no. I want to give my position away to James." And I was like standing there, my wife is crying, James was crying, you’re crying. I was crying. You know, it’s crazy'

Lose me, not him: Brooke asked host Tom Bergeron if she could leave the show so Van Der Beek could go to the final round. Farber shared: ‘I remember at one point you were like “No, no, no. I want to give my position away to James.” And I was like standing there, my wife is crying, James was crying, you’re crying. I was crying. You know, it’s crazy’

Hard times: Ally told her former partner Sasha Farber during her show that James was the better dancer. 'He was the one to watch during the season because he always performed beautifully,' she maintained

Hard times: Ally told her former partner Sasha Farber during her show that James was the better dancer. ‘He was the one to watch during the season because he always performed beautifully,’ she maintained

And it reminded her of when she was trolled when she was on X-Factor and with Fifth Harmony: ‘You don’t understand how much that can destroy someone. That destroyed me and it took me back to the really bad space where I was after X-Factor,’ she said. ‘My audition aired and I got so much hate there and that tore me apart. And then also, brought back a lot of memories of getting online hate for like, you know, my body or my dancing in Fifth Harmony. I just felt like man, I can’t take this.’

It made Brooke want to drop out.

‘I just remember after the show I wanted to quit. I want to give this to James. I don’t want to be here. I was done,’ she recalled. 

She wanted out: It made Brooke want to drop out. 'I just remember after the show I wanted to quit. I want to give this to James. I don’t want to be here. I was done,' she recalled

She wanted out: It made Brooke want to drop out. ‘I just remember after the show I wanted to quit. I want to give this to James. I don’t want to be here. I was done,’ she recalled

Brooke asked host Tom Bergeron if she could leave the show so Van Der Beek could go to the final round. 

Farber shared: ‘I remember at one point you were like “No, no, no. I want to give my position away to James.” And I was like standing there, my wife is crying, James was crying, you’re crying. I was crying. You know, it’s crazy. This is just a TV show, it’s just a dance show, but people build such strong bonds.’

Brooke and Farber placed third on the show. The Bachelorette star Hannah Brown and professional dancer Alan Bersten were the winners. 

In late May Ally talked about how she did not ‘enjoy’ her time with the all-girl group Fifth Harmony.

The blonde beauty stated that she had to endure ‘mental and verbal abuse’ when with the band: ‘There was so much toxicity!’ 

How she sees it: Brooke shared during the debut of her podcast The Ally Brooke Show, which can be found on her YouTube page, that she did not 'enjoy' her time with the all-girl group Fifth Harmony

How she sees it: Brooke shared during the debut of her podcast The Ally Brooke Show, which can be found on her YouTube page, that she did not ‘enjoy’ her time with the all-girl group Fifth Harmony

And she felt she had no one to complain to as a label head tried to ‘take advantage’ of her, even giving her a thong when she she went for help. She did not name the person.

During her podcast, Ally made it clear she did not ‘enjoy’ her time with the band.

‘I didn’t love it,’ she stated.

‘It was hard because there was so much going on. So much behind the scenes, so much toxicity, so much abuse, so much about of power, so much mental abuse, verbal abuse, and it’s just horrible and to me, it’s a shame because we were so big. I should have enjoyed myself more.’

The band: She was with Fifth Harmony from 2012 until 2018 as she belted out hit songs like Work From Home with her band mates Camila Cabello, Normani Kordei, Dinah Jane and Lauren Jauregui. Seen in 2016

The band: She was with Fifth Harmony from 2012 until 2018 as she belted out hit songs like Work From Home with her band mates Camila Cabello, Normani Kordei, Dinah Jane and Lauren Jauregui. Seen in 2016

She blamed the group’s label. The group signed a joint record deal with Simon Cowell’s label Syco Records and L.A. Reid’s label Epic Records after forming and finishing third in the second season of the American singing competition series The X Factor in 2012.

But Ally made sure to not name any specific person at her label during her podcast. 

The star claimed the singers were made to feel ‘inferior’ and ‘uncomfortable.’

And it is hard for her to look back on the glory days of Fifth Harmony. ‘I’ll look at a music video and all I’ll remember is how I felt that day. How I felt super insecure, or how I felt let down or how I felt like I wasn’t good enough,’ Brooke said.

The crooner hated to be told she ‘wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t cool enough.’

She added: ‘I wasn’t valued, nobody cared about me. It was awful but I also try to remember the good times.’

And the ladies had to push to get their voice on the tracks, which created a competitive environment.

‘At times, it definitely felt competitive,’ she said.

Brook then added, ‘Later on, it did get better and in some moments, there were moments for me to shine and feel like I could contribute but that was really, really hard.’

The band in 2017: Dinah Jane, Normani, Lauren and Ally onstage during the 2017 MTV Video Music Awards at The Forum in Inglewood, California

The band in 2017: Dinah Jane, Normani, Lauren and Ally onstage during the 2017 MTV Video Music Awards at The Forum in Inglewood, California

The experience took a toll on her confidence. Being called the ‘big one’ of the band ate away at her.

‘People said I was the fat one and all these things and especially in one moment when we were shooting a music video we were in bathing suits and I didn’t feel at my best,’ she said. 

‘And then there were paparazzi pictures that came out and people made fun of me so much and it was horrible.’  

When the group was breaking up, she went to a label head for advice but was not comforted. 

She moved on: Cabello went on to sing the hit song Senorita with real life beau Shawn Mendes; seen in 2019

She moved on: Cabello went on to sing the hit song Senorita with real life beau Shawn Mendes; seen in 2019

‘I show up to meet with him and he gives me a freaking thong. I know what he was trying to do. I was humiliated,’ Ally said.

‘I was going there super vulnerable [asking for help]… At the time, that behavior was accepted.’

No one appreciated how she tried to make everyone in the band happy, she claimed. 

‘I was that mom. I tried to keep us together as a unit. It was very, very hard,’ she shared adding she at times felt like no one would help her. 

‘There’s a weird balance of being grateful and being okay with the fact that things were not okay for me,’ she said. ‘It was traumatizing.’

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