Frankie Bridge's sister Tor discusses her fertility battle after suffering four miscarriages

8 mins read


Frankie Bridge’s sister Victoria ‘Tor’ Cook has opened up on her heartbreaking fertility battle after previously suffering with four miscarriages.

Appearing on Thursday’s Loose Women via video link from her home in Bermuda, Tor discussed her tough road to parenthood amid her numerous losses, explaining how she and her husband James thought the miscarriages were ‘normal’.

Blogger Tor, who has since welcomed twin boys, also opened up about the NHS’ current policy where they don’t look into fertility issues until a woman has had three miscarriages.

Tough road: Frankie Bridge's sister Victoria 'Tor' Cook has opened up on her heartbreaking fertility battle after previously suffering with four miscarriages

Tough road: Frankie Bridge’s sister Victoria ‘Tor’ Cook has opened up on her heartbreaking fertility battle after previously suffering with four miscarriages

Speaking to the panel, which included her The Saturdays star sister, 32, Tor said of her fertility struggles: ‘We got married in 2017 and then obviously did the normal thing of get married and have babies straight after and it didn’t quite work out that way.

‘We fell pregnant quite quickly, luckily that was something I could do. In October we found out we were pregnant first time, it was quite early miscarriage with that pregnancy, Obviously you know you’ve heard people having miscarriages not overly talked about.

‘Obviously with this whole don’t do anything until you’ve had three. The first one, I was like “oh it’s horrible, but it happens to people, so we will see what happens”. But then next time it happened and then next time… I don’t think at first we thought there was a problem, we thought it was normal, which is quite sad really.’

Sibling: Tor opened up to the Loose Women panel, which included sister Frankie (pictured), Blogger Tor about her fertility issues and road to motherhood

Sibling: Tor opened up to the Loose Women panel, which included sister Frankie (pictured), Blogger Tor about her fertility issues and road to motherhood

Going on to further discuss the issue of the NHS not looking into miscarriages until three has been had, she went on: ‘It’s something I’m working on with Tommy’s charity, to stop that, they don’t look into it on NHS until three miscarriages… it happens in a lot of countries as well. 

‘Because they are so common and your body does so many different things, they won’t look into it till three miscarriages. And actually, one is bad enough, and the impact it has on you mentally and physically… we’re trying to stop that and hopefully look into it if you’ve just had one.’ 

During the interview, Tor also discussed how their losses had affected her husband James, explaining how her sister Frankie made sure he was OK.

So sad: Appearing on Thursday's Loose Women via video link from her home in Bermuda, Tor discussed her tough road to parenthood amid her numerous losses, explaining how she and her husband James thought the miscarriages were 'normal'

So sad: Appearing on Thursday’s Loose Women via video link from her home in Bermuda, Tor discussed her tough road to parenthood amid her numerous losses, explaining how she and her husband James thought the miscarriages were ‘normal’

She said: ‘The thing is, people forget about men as well. He just hated that it was me and my body that was going through it. 

‘Obviously mentally he tried to stay strong for us, he was sad, we tried not to blame ourselves, which I know really easy to say. He wanted to take my pain away, the physical pain that I was going through. 

‘Frankie was good checking in with him and making sure that we didn’t forget about him.’

Heartbreaking: 'I don’t think at first we thought there was a problem, we thought it was normal, which is quite sad really'

Heartbreaking: ‘I don’t think at first we thought there was a problem, we thought it was normal, which is quite sad really’

Not good: Blogger Tor, who has since welcomed twin boys, also opened up about the NHS' current policy where they don't look into fertility issues until a woman has had three miscarriages

Not good: Blogger Tor, who has since welcomed twin boys, also opened up about the NHS’ current policy where they don’t look into fertility issues until a woman has had three miscarriages

Struggles: 'Because they are so common and your body does so many different things, they won't look into it till three miscarriages. And actually, one is bad enough'

Struggles: ‘Because they are so common and your body does so many different things, they won’t look into it till three miscarriages. And actually, one is bad enough’

At which the singer quipped: ‘We love James, he’s a good egg!’ 

The All Fired Up hitmaker went on to admit she felt ‘guilty’ about having her sons Carter and Parker around Tor, believing she was ‘rubbing’ her fertility in her sister’s face.

She explained: ‘It was difficult for both of us, we’ve always been really close. Tor always knew I was going to settle down have babies young age anyway. 

‘It wasn’t really until she was ready to have kids and then going through the struggle it was really hard, I often didn’t know right thing to say and I would often feel guilty being around her my boys. 

Guilty: The All Fired Up hitmaker went on to admit she felt 'guilty' about having her sons Carter and Parker around Tor, believing she was 'rubbing' her fertility in her sister's face

Guilty: The All Fired Up hitmaker went on to admit she felt ‘guilty’ about having her sons Carter and Parker around Tor, believing she was ‘rubbing’ her fertility in her sister’s face

Candid: 'I often didn’t know right thing to say and I would often feel guilty being around her my boys'

Candid: ‘I often didn’t know right thing to say and I would often feel guilty being around her my boys’

‘There was one time when we came over to Bermuda to see you and you were pregnant at time and miscarried baby while we were there. 

‘You said it was nice we were there as a distraction, but  I couldn’t help but feel guilty, like I was rubbing Tor’s in it with my kids.’

Tor underwent IVF treatment shortly before the pandemic and ahead of her treatment, learned she had a condition in which her cells ‘attacked’ her foetus, believing it to be a foreign body. 

Announcement: Blogger Tor announced the arrival of her twin babies in a sweet Instagram in October, after giving birth the previous week

Announcement: Blogger Tor announced the arrival of her twin babies in a sweet Instagram in October, after giving birth the previous week

Blogger Tor announced the arrival of her twin babies in a sweet Instagram in October, after giving birth the previous week.

The mother-of-two shared a snap of Sonny and Rafferty lay next to each other as well as a snap of herself holding them in a hospital bed next to husband James.

She captioned the snap: ‘Introducing…. Sonny Sandford Cook – 4.3lbs born at 17.22 Rafferty (Rafa) Ronald Cook – 4.8lbs born at 17.25. Thursday 8th October. The best things to happen in 2020 and totally worth the wait … so much love.’ 

Auntie Frankie! Frankie pictured with her nephews shortly after their birth

Auntie Frankie! Frankie pictured with her nephews shortly after their birth

Family: Frankie and husband Wayne Bridge have two sons, Parker, seven, and Carter, five. Tor married James Cook in 2017, and the couple relocated to Bermuda last summer

Family: Frankie and husband Wayne Bridge have two sons, Parker, seven, and Carter, five. Tor married James Cook in 2017, and the couple relocated to Bermuda last summer

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